Up Ahead: Construction Zone

Recently, a former student visited me and I was amazed at her laziness. She graduated from high school and she doesn't do anything. She's not in school, she sleeps in until noon, doesn't have a job and her parents pay for whatever she needs or wants. And while I was appalled that she's not doing anything to progress in life, I realized that when things are handed to you, it's easy to self-indulge. And if you're not living for Christ, you're living for yourself, I shouldn't be surprised by her actions or lack thereof.

When living for Christ, it's such a continual practice to block out my needs, look to others' needs and bring glory to God. As Christians, we are called to "put off" and "put on". We're called to think on things that are noble. We're called to consider others better than ourselves. We're called to resist temptation. We're called to pick up our cross daily and follow Him. We're called to consider ourselves as sold to Christ. We're called to praise Him when we're in the midst of suffering. We're called to bring Him glory in everything we say or do. If anyone thinks that the Christian life is mindless, a crutch or easy-they have another thing coming to them.

If you haven't figured it out already, I have a weakness for griping. It used to be a mindless thing to moan about anything until I was convicted that it was indeed considered complaining. Complaining was not exactly included in the fruits of the spirit. Why is it so easy to embrace the "vegetables" of the spirit and not the fruits? One word: Sin. It shouldn't be a surprise to anyone that my answer didn't require much thinking. Not that I intentionally practice sinning on a daily basis, but sin is so pervasive in this world; it is a constant battle to not get caught in it.

This school year has given me reason to complain-the traffic in my morning commute that used to be semi-predictable has been testing my patience. Two of the four freeways I drive are under construction and my commute time has been stretched to an additional 10-30 minutes than it was last year. It is so hard not to get annoyed when traffic slows down to a complete halt and even more aggravating when it is without any apparent reason. I've never been late to work but one day this week, I made it to school by the skin of my teeth. I got to class five minutes before it started. For some teachers, arriving five minutes before class starts is not a problem but I like to make sure everything is exactly in place before class starts.

On the way to school, I noticed that traffic was particularly heavy and I had to turn my radio off because I was feeling overwhelmed and purposely prayed. I first petitioned God as to why the barrage of traffic, that I left an hour early for work, that I just didn't understand why this kept having to happen and that I really needed to be at work on time, etc. If I were to dissect my behavior it would look like this: 1) Slight annoyance 2) Aggravation 3) Panic 4) Complaint 5)Desperation 6)Anger 7)Puzzlement. Last time I checked, these were those things we're supposed to put off. However, my behavior didn't stop here because I have learned to still go to the Lord in the midst of suffering or trials (I know traffic is not suffering, but it felt like it in the moment). I then told the Lord that I didn't understand why I was so close to being late to work but that I knew He is sovereign in everything. At that moment, I knew that behavior actions 1-7 needed to be stopped. I knew that I needed to turn it around as praise for Him for His plan and hand in every aspect of my life. I knew that I needed to have an attitude of thanksgiving because after all, we are to give thanks in every circumstance-even it's a boondoggle.

I am reminded of the Psalms of Lament. David wrote plenty of Psalms beseeching the Father, making known his fears and complaints but he always turned his grief to praise. The Psalms demonstrate the biblical writers' thoughts the same as our own thoughts. We can easily relate to the Psalms because they are written by hurting people and they focus on finding resolve in Jesus Christ. Sometimes the little things in life may irritate us. However, when we focus on the truths found in His Word, we can find joy in the midst of those little irritations and big irritations.

Psalm 63 is about being in the midst of suffering or in the midst of a trial. David writes that his flesh thirsts for God and not water. Doesn't this bring conviction to your heart? Many times, I think I know what will satisfy me, but ultimately, God is the only one who can quench that thirst. Praise God! He is our Living Water and those that turn to Him will never be thirsty. Our joy is made complete in our satisfaction in God rather than physical comforts. Though suffering is not something we can change, we can change our response. We must thirst after our Master and run to Jesus because if we don't, we will be slaves to a ruthless task master where satisfaction will be like a fading leaf.

My life is like a construction zone in California-God's work in my life never stops. He is constantly improving it, shaping me into His image but his work will not perfected here on earth. And while I may be needing to "Slow Down for the Cone Zone" figuratively and literally, I must remember His hand in my life. His plans are full of dips and bumps, but I must not detour from His ways because He is sovereign in everything.

So, though I walk through the shadow of the valley of death, I will fear no one because the Lord is with me every step of the way. I must run to Him and yearn for Him like no other. I know that He hasn't abandoned me and my enemies will not exalt over me because He is for me, not against me. Knowing and focusing on His truths daily remind me that I can overcome evil with good, I can put on joy when I'm feeling sorrow, I can bear my cross daily and bring Him glory in EVERY situation in ALL that I do. Praise God for making that possible in our lives!


1 How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever?
How long will you hide your face from me?
2 How long must I take counsel in my soul
and have sorrow in my heart all the day?
How long shall my enemy be exalted over me?

3 Consider and answer me, O Lord my God;
light up my eyes, lest I sleep the sleep of death,
4 lest my enemy say, “I have prevailed over him,”
lest my foes rejoice because I am shaken.

5 But I have trusted in your steadfast love;
my heart shall rejoice in your salvation.
6 I will sing to the Lord,
because he has dealt bountifully with me-Psalm 13

And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit, addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ-Ephesians 5:18-21

Since then we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need-Hebrews 4:14-16

1 O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you;
my soul thirsts for you;
my flesh faints for you,
as in a dry and weary land where there is no water.
2 So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary,
beholding your power and glory.
3 Because your steadfast love is better than life,
my lips will praise you.
4 So I will bless you as long as I live;
in your name I will lift up my hands.

5 My soul will be satisfied as with fat and rich food,
and my mouth will praise you with joyful lips,
6 when I remember you upon my bed,
and meditate on you in the watches of the night;
7 for you have been my help,
and in the shadow of your wings I will sing for joy.
8 My soul clings to you;
your right hand upholds me.

9 But those who seek to destroy my life
shall go down into the depths of the earth;
10 they shall be given over to the power of the sword;
they shall be a portion for jackals.
11 But the king shall rejoice in God;
all who swear by him shall exult,
for the mouths of liars will be stopped-Psalm 63

The Least Appreciated Gift

Do you ever feel so exhausted that sometimes you view your days or weeks as checkboxes on a checklist for that week? My fall is packed, not only during the week, but on the weekend as well. Already, I've coordinated a wedding, for three weekends I will spend 14 hours each weekend sitting at a biblical counseling training at church, go to church, sing in choir, go to a wedding, cook for a wedding and of course, the week has a chockfull of events that sometimes take up two to four nights a week in addition to work.

Earlier this week, I dreaded spending all night Friday and all day Saturday at church. I knew I would be learning great stuff but by Wednesday, I was whipped. The fact that I can sleep in on Saturday (past 5:50) brings me great joy because it's a day without an agenda. As Friday rolled around this morning, I knew that even though school was over at 3, my day was hardly over. So, I drove an hour home, picked up a sandwich for dinner and arrived at church and of course, I was pretty sleepy by the time I sat down. I looked at the schedule and saw that I'd be sitting through four one hour lectures on various topics on counseling others. I jokingly said to a friend, "I was hoping there'd be some single guys in here, I mean, that's the reason I came tonight" because the first lecture was, "Helping Singles Glorify God".

As soon as the lecture began, I was so thankful that I actually signed up for this training. I felt revived and definitely encouraged. My fatigue was strengthened only by God's grace and what I learned tonight was so convicting, encouraging and a reminder that only God is my Reviver and Giver of Life.

It is rare for a topic such as the issues of a single person to be addressed in the Christian church and boy, was it refreshing. When someone speaks on something you can totally relate to, they have validated all of the thoughts, experiences and feelings you've faced and it's
almost impossible to not say, "mmm hmm" or "amen". When it comes to the church culture and and the single person, there are some misconceptions that need to be changed on both sides. If single people don't live according to the Word, they can be an affront to the church. If the church doesn't address single people biblically, they will drive away this valuable asset from their church.

A common misconception amongst the church is that single people have oodles and oodles of time and they shouldn't be frittering away their extra time on things that bring themselves joy.

A couple of years ago while I was attending a singles group at church, the married leaders thought of a serving opportunity for the singles. The leaders arranged for free babysitting on Valentine's Day evening so that the young married couples could go out on a date. I realize that there will be times when we just need to humble ourselves and be ready for ANY service opportunity but in this case, it felt like a slap in the face. Many single people are lonely on Valentine's Day (even if it is a made-up holiday) and to babysit alone for a happily married couple, was like pouring salt on the wounds. However, the hardest aspect for me to deal with was that it was a work night. At the time, I worked in Antioch, drove home and then had to spend another 40 minutes driving to Pittsburg during commute hour to babysit for four or five hours. I was sheer exhausted by the end of the night.

By 5 p.m. on any weekday, single people, just like any working person or parent, are in need of rest. Just like any working person or parent, single people only have 24 hours in their day too.

And while I do work, I try to serve in as many capacities as humanly possible for me because I love the church. Single people, just like married members in the church must be ready to serve in ANY capacity, they must be a blessing to others and seek ways to encourage and edify the body. Cleaning the church toilets is not just the married members' job but the singles' as well-we must be ready to serve with humility and not relegate the grittiest jobs to a "lowly" member.

According to I Corinthians 7, singleness is a gift for some people. However, the church sometimes treats it as a gift that no one wants to have. Single people aren't usually "allowed" to hold a high leadership role because it is believed that marriage and parenthood creates responsibility. The sermons and Sunday School curriculum rarely address singleness as a gift and it may be that the majority of the members in the church have a desire for marriage. Even though many of the members in the church are families or parents, singleness continues to rise whether it's one who has never married, experienced divorce or who has become widowed. The church needs to value singles, be a constant encouragement and demonstrate that God has a significant role for the single person. Being inclusive and reaching out to the single person will allow them to find pleasure in serving others. My friend recently told me about something at her church called, "Dinner for 7". I thought this was a swell idea because it gave a chance for a single person to interact and fellowship with three other couples.

If single people are not pointed in the biblical direction of finding joy in this gift, they will not serve and will only find ways to serve themselves. Having a biblical perspective allows the single person to appreciate the "perks" of being single: more time to serve the Lord, freedom from the constraints of a family or spouse and more flexibility. The speaker on the first lecture tonight said,"Single persons are to glorify God and worship Jesus by using their freedom from worldly concerns to serve the living God."

If you're married, don't be afraid to reach out to the single person and show them love. Many single people are needy because they want acceptance, compassion, and someone who is willing to come aside and encourage them. Don't be surprised when a single person comes to your house on a holiday (like Christmas or Thanksgiving) and stays later than you'd like and maybe past your bedtime-having them over is such a huge ministry and act of love to them.

If you're single, love the church. Serve wherever you can and compensate for those ministries where married people can't devote as much time. Serve with a heart of gladness and find contentment in the presence of Christ.


I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord-I Corinthians 7:32-34

Now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it-I Corinthians 12:27.

so we, though many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another-Romans 12:5

Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him-Colossians 3:16-17

And he said to all, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. -Luke 9:23

Finding Comfort in Tragedy

Tomorrow is the tenth anniversary of 9/11. As if you didn't know. Actually, it's become so strange to teach and find out that some of my students were as young as four years old and didn't really understand what was going on. My roommate's fifth graders were only a few months old on 9/11 and couldn't tell you what happened that day if it weren't for the videos and photographs.

9/11 for me is like the assassination of JFK for my mom's generation. You remember where you were, your thoughts and fears, your feelings and being glued to the news to find out all that you could. I was teaching preschool then and my sister (she was living on the east coast) called my mom to tell her what was happening since it was only 6 in the morning for us. My mom came into my room and showed me the news on the TV. If school had been cancelled, I would've stayed home to soak up all that I could to get any information on the events of that day.

I have so many memories of that tragic day. I remember looking up at the sky to find that not a plane was in sight for a few days because the FAA had grounded all flights. I remember buying a flag to put on my car to show my patriotism for our country-in fact many others placed flags on their cars as well. I remember our church service the following Sunday. I remember the fact that people couldn't connect with much of the east coast by telephone and desperately wanted to know if their loved ones were alive. Even though I didn't personally know anyone who had died, I was caught up in the happenings of 9/11 and to this day, I still am.

What my students don't realize is that 9/11 changed the face of America. They may see it in movies from the 80s or 90s, but they won't see a non-passenger going up to the airline gate to say goodbye to a friend or family member. They probably didn't know that you could park at the curb and leave your car unattended to help your friend get to their gate or that you didn't have to stay seated within 30 minutes of arrival even if you needed to use the restroom. My students have never experienced an America that was true to itself-they've only been used to a politically correct era where we won't declare who our enemies are or we will not denounce those who attacked us. Sadly, my students have been brought up to be ashamed of our country or believe our country is egocentric. The truth is, declaring what is true is frowned upon these days.

What my students missed out on during the days of 9/11 was the re-focus on God. Yes, it was for a brief minute that some flocked to the churches on the following Sunday, but some truly turned their wicked hearts over to the Lord. There was a heart of desperation that cried out to the Lord because they knew that they couldn't depend on anyone or themselves to relieve their fears. However, it is hard to ignore the sad fact that history does repeat itself. Today, just like the Israelites, Americans have turned to their own gods and reject the true God.

And all is right in this world. If I had made this statement ten years ago, I probably would've been declared the village idiot and that others should never listen to me. However, if you're a Christian, you must believe two things: 1) God is sovereign and 2) things will worsen in this world-they won't get better.

As I've spiritually matured, I've become enamored with the sovereignty of God. Knowing that God is sovereign in all things means that He knew-no, He caused the events of 9/11 to happen. I know that Christians hate to use the term, "caused" because it makes our God out to be cruel but what is the better alternative? Should we use the term, "allowed" as if God passively sits in heaven and allows four airplanes to crash? Did He passively sit and allow for some to die and others to get rescued or escape the tragedy of that Tuesday? Those that were saved believe it was a miracle that they lived and some have questioned as to why they lived while others died. Would it be fair to say that like the "game" 52 Card Pick-Up, God threw the cards up in the air, randomly selected those that would live and those He didn't pick up, would die? Or did God number each one's days and know them completely before they were born? Obviously, I believe the latter.

I can ponder as to God's reasons for causing such an enormity, I can ask Him why, but in the end, I still have to praise Him and be obedient to His ways. I am reminded of God's eloquent response to Job: Can you draw out Leviathan with a fishhook or press down his tongue with a cord? (Job 41:1) If God asked me the rhetorical questions as He did of Job, I would probably have my eyes to the ground and quietly say, "Um, no" as I realized my foolishness in beseeching the Lord as to why I was going through many trials.

While I don't understand God's reasoning in most things, I must choose to trust and obey Him whether it's a monstrosity like 9/11, the recent increase in traffic or the fact that I'm still not married. God is in control and He is a God of structure and order even though it sometimes doesn't feel that way.

Though it would be nice to see an era of God-fearing people, hearts transformed and for morals and ethics to improve, I know that this is not possible during my lifetime. I don't say this to be a "Debbie Downer" but I say it out of hope. I know that Jesus can return any day and when He does, this world will be experiencing trauma worse than 9/11. The false peace that will invade the hearts of many will be shocked when the Lord that they MUST bow down to will return to earth to bring His own with Him. For this day, I eagerly await but I most am eager when perfect justice will reign on earth-the way the world should be-as God has planned.

I know if I declared to be thankful for 9/11, I'd probably be branded as an Islamic Terrorist (I mean, insurrectionist as they were being called a couple of years ago) but in a way, I am thankful for its occurrence. I am saddened for the the lost lives and families of the victims, but I know that I am called to give thanks in every situation-I am trying to do so in obedience to the Lord.

While the events of 9/11 came and passed, it wasn't without the hand of God being involved. It wasn't a surprise to Him because He caused it to happen. I can see that we are on a road to oblivion and that God will soon intervene. I can see how God transformed the hearts of some men and women that were drawn to Him during that time. I love that it is God who is at work in people and that they don't change unless God gets a hold of their hearts and transforms them for His good. Lastly, I can see that God is mighty, omniscient and is sovereign in all aspects of our lives-whether it is 9/11 or if we are still single, desiring a husband.

For you formed my inward parts;you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you,when I was being made in secret,intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance;in your book were written, every one of them,the days that were formed for me,when as yet there was none of them-Psalm 139:13-16

Is a trumpet blown in a city, and the people are not afraid? Does disaster come to a city, unless the LORD has done it?-Amos 3:6

I form light and create darkness, I make well-being and create calamity, I am the LORD, who does all these things-Isaiah 45:7

Is it not from the mouth of the Most High that good and bad come?-Lamentations 3:38

“For thus says the LORD: Just as I have brought all this great disaster upon this people, so I will bring upon them all the good that I promise them-Jeremiah 32:42

“O LORD, make me know my end and what is the measure of my days; let me know how fleeting I am!-Psalm 39:4

They have healed the wound of my people lightly, saying, ‘Peace, peace,’ when there is no peace-Jeremiah 6:14

While people are saying, “There is peace and security,” then sudden destruction will come upon them as labor pains come upon a pregnant woman, and they will not escape-I Thessalonians 5:3

so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth-Philippians 2:10

Why I Can't Relate

Recently, I watched a "Seinfeld" rerun where George, Elaine, Kramer and Jerry stood on the street watching a man while he was getting "carjacked". After the foursome cracked jokes as the man yelled for help, they were arrested for not submitting to the "Good Samaritan" law. The Good Samaritan law requires that a person must assist someone in need of help. It is shameful that a law even exists-that some people wouldn't have enough compassion to come to the aid of another of their own volition.

This week, one of my students was admitted to the hospital after having severe pains in her abdominal area. She was in the hospital for three days as the doctors performed various tests to figure out what was ailing her. She hadn't eaten for at least three days and threw up blood. Finally, they figured out that her gallbladder needed to be removed. A couple of years ago, she had a ruptured cyst removed as well as her appendix. She suffers from stomach migraines as well as migraine headaches. As a result of the migraines, she's had memory loss and as long as she's been my student, she has dealt with numerous health issues.

I can't relate. I don't mean to say this glibly as if I don't have compassion for people that have health issues. I have tons of compassion for those who suffer physically. However, since I've never had serious health problems, I can't relate. I've never stayed overnight in the hospital-except when I was born. Yes, I've gone to the E.R. but the most serious injury I've experienced was a broken arm.

I totally take my health for granted. Every morning, I wake up unfazed by any health problems (aside from the occasional stiffness in my body) that daily torment others. While I do have some issues (such as a failing disk in my fifth lumbar, some arthritis in my back, severe allergies, occasional migraines and possibly an over-active vagus nerve), they aren't an impediment to my daily activities or my life in general. With medicine, (if needed) I can control my ailments.

When I come into contact with people who physically suffer daily, I am amazed at their perseverance. My students who have chronic migraines, come to class, pay attention while trying to ignore the piercing pain inside their head. Some even throw up as a result of the pain while I have avoided throwing up for six years now. It makes me wonder why God chose certain people to take on physical suffering and why He chose others to endure emotional suffering. If I delve deeper, why does He allow some families to suffer with physical disabilities? Of course, the answer is: I don't know.

Today, our pastor was talking about the early church asking for boldness and courage to endure persecution. The Christians weren't asking for relief of their suffering-they were beseeching God for strength to face their tormentors. Even though we aren't being persecuted for proclaiming the Gospel-at least not to the extent that the early church experienced, we aren't to shirk what He has already ordained. We are to face it with courage, boldness, knowing that our strength comes from Him alone. On the other hand, it's not sinful to ask for relief from a trial. Paul asked for the "thorn in his side" to be removed but God provided His grace for Paul to endure it.

Jesus' death on the cross was the apotheosis of any suffering we have and will ever experience. This used to be hard for me to understand because I always thought that Jesus never understood what it was like to have cancer or migraines or the emotional ups and downs of being single. After coming to grips with my fallacious way of thinking, I realized that we don't need to play the game of "Tit For Tat" with Jesus because He is omniscient. He experienced physical pain like no other and I have the nerve to say, "But He didn't have cancer." He experienced hunger for 40 days and it is possible that He had a migraine. And if He was impervious to headaches while fasting, think of the cross where He had to endure the physical pain of hanging, that alone could cause a migraine. While Jesus wasn't reportedly unsatisfied with staying single, He experienced loneliness on this earth. At the cross, He was abandoned by the disciples (with the exception of John), his family (with the exception of Mary) and the world hated Him. As if that wasn't enough suffering for one day, Jesus did nothing to deserve it.

Just as Jesus has had compassion on us, we are to have compassion on others as well-even if we can't relate to their particular issue. The fact of the matter is that in some way, we can relate because we too know what it means to suffer. We are to be a support for that person when they are in need. It is our duty as Christians, to bring encouragement, joy, accountability, love and help for those suffering.

When I found out that Bree was at the hospital on Monday, I texted her after school to see how she was doing. Still not knowing what was causing her pain, I asked her if she was praying about it and I reminded her that the Lord knew that this was going to happen long before the foundations of the world. I told her that I was praying as well and to keep me posted. The next day, I had the opportunity to visit her in the hospital. I don't want to come across as this perfect Christian who is perfect in every situation-I'm not here to toot my own horn. To me, it is a reminder that no matter what someone is going through, we can be there for them. We don't have to fully relate because we haven't experienced it ourselves. We tend to have patience for those that experience the same trials we've faced, we even have a higher tolerance for them because we understand the pain that they are enduring. However, we are called to a higher standard: we are to bear each others' burdens.

My job is not to rate another person's sufferings and determine if I can relate or not. I'm not to present my analysis to the Lord in terms of who suffers emotionally versus who suffers physically. I don't need to seek ways to alleviate someone of their suffering. My responsibility is to support, love, care and show compassion for those who suffer-no matter what they face. After all, that's what Jesus does for us consistently when we don't deserve it.

Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ-Galatians 6:2

We who are strong have an obligation to bear with the failings of the weak, and not to please ourselves-Romans 15:1

Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others-Philippians 2:4

Let each of us please his neighbor for his good, to build him up-Romans 15:2

There was not a needy person among them, for as many as were owners of lands or houses sold them and brought the proceeds of what was sold-Acts 4:34

Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep-Romans 12:15

Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind-I Peter 3:8