'Course it's Ten Minutes to Wapner

Last week I was taking an afternoon nap (can you tell that it's summer for me?) and right before I fell asleep, I had a strange memory from when I was six years old. It was strange because it was something that I observed as a kid and it has stayed with me up 'til now. I remember when my family was checking out a house to rent and when the owner showed us the bedrooms, there was a man taking a nap on a bed. When this memory popped up last week, I wondered if it was true. Later in the week, I asked my mom and she said that she too remembered the man napping on the bed.

When someone gets to know me, they will learn three things: 1) I'm really observant 2) I have a penchant for remembering dates of past, present and future events and 3) I have an excellent memory. While these are great traits to have, they can also prove to be detrimental for me.

Having a good memory means that I almost never forget birthdays, appointments (I don't even own a calendar), bills that need to be paid, food in the oven (no timer for me) and deadlines at work. These are all great aspects of my elephant-like memory. However, the downside is when I have trouble forgetting when I've been wronged. There was a time when holding grudges was easily a second pastime for me. Over the years though, the Lord has helped me work out those feelings in my heart and forgiving isn't as much of a struggle as it used to be. What does one do when this happens within the body of Christ? To me, it seems easier to forgive someone who is not a Christian because they are living in the flesh-what else can be expected when someone's "number one" is themself?

When we are wronged by someone outside the body of Christ, we tend to forgive and learn-meaning, we don't usually set ourselves up to be vulnerable or repeat the same situation. We may distance ourselves from that person or if we must have contact, we guard our hearts when dealing with them. On the other hand, with a Christian, many times we will seek ways to reconcile and may give them additional opportunities to prove themselves as our friend. I struggle with giving someone additional opportunities because I don't want to be hurt repeatedly and then of course I am reminded of Peter's conversation with Jesus about forgiveness-really, I'm supposed to forgive someone at least 490 times?!

I cannot count the times where I've wanted justice and would love for others to know how I was offended by that individual. Before I am able to fantasize any more about getting my revenge, the Lord has this way of holding the Mirror of Conviction that reflects, "You too, do the same thing to Me". Touché Lord, touché.

There needs to be a balance of forgiveness and natural consequences. Yes, we are called to forgive but we are not necessarily called to have the same kind of friendship as before. Would it be pleasing to the Lord to carry on as if nothing detrimental ever occurred in the relationship or would it be more pleasing to Him if we showed wisdom in continuing the relationship more conservatively? This is one of those gray areas that should be handled on an individual basis and yet we should always be ready to do what the Lord asks of us.

Sometimes I don't "feel" like loving this person but when I obey the Lord, He tends to give me a supernatural love for them. Feelings can be good indicators of when something is right or wrong but they are not always true. I cannot base my life on feelings because I would only be pleasing myself and never bring glory to the Lord.

I am so grateful that the Lord will not only perfect and restore those Christian relationships when we go to heaven, but He will someday reign with perfect justice here on earth. Those are two reasons I'm ready for Him to come back now!

So, with my keen memory, observation skills and "Rainman"* penchant for dates, I'm going to use them for the good because I know that that would be most pleasing to the Lord. I will make it a point to complement that person if I see a change in their appearance (like, "Oh, I like your hair"), I will make it a point to say, "Happy Birthday" or "Happy Anniversary" and lastly, I will remember that they (like me) are far from perfect and that they need the Lord's grace daily and I will pray for them. Lastly, with that keen memory, I will remember all of the times that the Lord has forgiven me (when I never deserve it) without any strings attached. He's gone so far as to bury my sins into the depths of the sea and as far as the east is from the west. And with that, I better remember to have a heart of thanksgiving!

Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven-Matthew 18:21-22

Bless the Lord, O my soul,
and forget not all his benefits,
who forgives all your iniquity,
who heals all your diseases,
who redeems your life from the pit-Psalm 103:2-4a

He does not deal with us according to our sins,
nor repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth,so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west,so far does he remove our transgressions from us-Psalm 103:10-12

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things-I Corinthians 13:4-7

If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat,
and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink,
for you will heap burning coals on his head,
and the Lord will reward you-Proverbs 25:20-21

But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us-Romans 5:8

Whoever says he is in the light and hates his brother is still in darkness-I John 2:9


*Rainman is a movie about a high functioning autistic man who has a penchant for routine, counting and dates.